1 week to go before I can do a pregnancy test.

I am seriously going out of my mind, I’m impatient and anxious and I just want to know already. Am I frickin’ pregnant or not??? I don’t know when I ovulated and I don’t know how long my cycle will be this month. Last month it was 32 days but that was the first cycle after stoping the pill so who knows! I have lotsof symptoms this month, same as last month, but i’m scared to get my hopes up as I felt rubbish last month when I AF arrived.

Month 2 of ttc – symptoms

Headaches, bloated, constipation, sore boobs, hard tummy low down, pain for 3 days on right hand side of pelic region, crying at babies on the television.

Thats it so far. God I am yearning so madly and deeply for a pregnant belly. PLease let it be my turn this month, please……

Jen

xxx

I have been in hiding due to severe embarrassment!

Now I know I am supposed to be honest in my blog but I just couldn’t face the embarrasment I would suffer from this one. It has taken me a little while to come clean. Last month was our first month trying to concieve numero 2 and I really truly believed I was pregnant. I had all of the symptoms even down to implantation bleeding on 8dpo. When my period was 4 days late I though it had to be it! Alas, last Friday, my dreaded period arrived. What happened to my instinct, it had been completely besieged by my obsession with becoming pregnant. I am sure I’m not the first ttc-er out there that has done this and I won’t be the last but, jeeeez, its embarrasing. Its almost like I tricked myself into believeing I was pregnant. Will have to be a little more careful this month and keep my insane ravings to the confines of my head!

Is being a stay at home mum easy?

Its a forever open can of worms, with working mums, stay at home mums and mum’s all over the world wanting to profess that what they do is hard work and everyone else has it easy. Having never experienced being a working mum first hand it is a little hard for me to compare, however, one of my very close friends, Ruby, shares with me on a daily basis the turmoils she suffers from working part time and looking after her 8 month old daughter. We met up for lunch recently and she was in a terrible state, the worst I have ever seen her in. Her mother-in-law looks after her little girl while she goes to work 3 days a week. In the begining the situation was ideal.  Ruby was so happy to have a bit of her life back if only for 3 days a week. The pay was decent enough to allow her to continue with the lifestyle she had become accustommed to and not feel guilty about spending the moolar! So when we met up for lunch it came as a supprise to find her not so comfortable with the chilcare arrangement anymore. She said that after spending christmas with her in-laws, she had been driven crazy with the way her mother-in-law always thought she knew what her baby wanted. Everything she did with her own child was criticised and it was ” Oooooh, no, she doesn’t need that, she needs this..etc”. She lost the plot one day at the dining table and blew her top, storming out of the room, leaving everyone in shock Ruby is now contemplating giving up her job to look after her baby girl full time. I did’nt really know what to say. Of course, I consoled her and said that her in-laws were being insensitive but deep down I think she knew that this is the path she had chosen to go down when she decided to return to work. Although it is not a choice but a necessitiy for some who need the money in order to pay the bills, those that go back to work  for whatever reason, have to accept that whoever is looking after their child is going to get to know them well and in effect, is temporarily taking over the role of mother.

So, being a stay at home mum is definately emotionally easier. I would say having to switch between employee and mother every day is pretty tough on your sense of “self”! On a daily basis as far as stress and workload goes, I would have to admit that staying at home is slightly easier in my opinion. Its not a case of intellect but of being able to choose when you do your hours that makes a huge difference on your everyday level of happiness. Alright, so I know you need huge amounts of patience and a strong will to spend all day, every day with your kids while doing the mundane household chores, but you can’t argue with the fact that if you have had a restless night with your little one, at least you get the opportunity to catch up on sleep when they go down for a nap. You can do the washing up whenever youwant to that day, there is no strict order in which these things must be done and the flexibility you get with staying at home really reduces the pressure on you in comparrision to someone who has to be there for a meeting at 9am sharp, or needs to hand in a project by the end of that week.

So my sympathy does go out to all the working mums out there, especially those that don’t have a choice…everything comes at a price and I’d rather give up my career any day than give up the precious moments spent with my babies.

Mother Vs. Lover; How do we balance the act?

Since becoming a mum the one thing I have found hard to accomplish is the daily transition from mother to lover. I’m not talking just about sex but about the whole process of shutting off once your sproglets are in bed and having time with your partner. It is not something that comes easy to me at all.  The more I think about it, change on the whole is quite uncomfortable for me. Despite always having the urge to be moving forward in life, once something does change (ie. moving house, new job, new baby, etc) it takes quite a while until I feel comfortable with it. So when the babies are in bed and the evening begins, how do you cope with letting go of the mummy feeling and participating in couple time? For instance, if I have just come downstairs after doing the bedtime routine and my partner instantly comes over to me for a cuddle, I just can’t handle it. The conflicting emotions in me between mother and lover are just too different and I really need a good half an hour to settle myself into the new role. Once I am ready though its fine, I just have to have that little bit of time to adjust after a whole day of nappy changing, food throwing, picking up off the floor etc. Am I the only one that finds it hard? I really hope not!

Weight loss challenge – Wii Fit Vs. Treadmill!

Off the back of my previous post regarding Angelina Jolie losing her baby weight by using the Wii Fit, another blogger has agreed to a weight loss comparison over the course of 1 week.  Here is his blog if you want to take a look…

http://takingthestairs.wordpress.com/

He will be using the Wii Fit and I shall be using the treadmill. We are both doing approx. the same intensity work out and I think the results will be really interesting. I know it’s a rough comparison but at least it will give us some movtivation to get exercising!!!

Results will be posted on Saturday 10th January. Forget Mini me….Skinny me here I come!

Having babies…is there an age limit?

I can’t quite believe what I have just read in a newspaper article…Rajo, from Haryana, India has given birth to a baby girl at the grand old age of 70!  It goes on to say that the couple are planning to try again for a baby boy. I know that more women are having babies in their late 30’s now but 70’s? Does the baby girl even stand a chance of knowing or remembering her parents? I suppose, in theory, they could be grandparents at the age of 86. It just all seems a bit too selfish in my opinion. They must have considered the fact that they might not see their child grow up and yet they still press on regardless. What about the poor little girl who finds herself parentless at such a young age? I mean the odds are not stacked in the parent’s favour, they could be gone before the child’s 5th birthday. The article states that they had been trying to concieve a child for 55 years. I’ll be suprised if I can muster the strength to get up the stairs when I’m 70 let alone get my leg over!!!!

I guess at the end of the day it is a matter of personal choice and its really nobody’s business but their own as to how old they are when they choose to concieve a baby.

The most shocking part of that article was the price the couple paid for IVF treatment  – £2,000.

Quick…everyone over to India for their IVF!

Read the full story here – http://www.thesun.co.uk/sol/homepage/news/article2082628.ece

How I plan to take better care of myself in 2009.

As a first time mum of 1 and ttc number 2, there are a few things I would like to change this year. I want to come out of the other end of 2009 feeling like a mum instead of  trying to feel the way I used to feel before I had kids. Pining for those size 8 tops and skinny jeans to fit me again; remembering the admiring glances that always came my way from the opposite sex. How many stolen minutes have I wasted in front of the mirror, pinching in my waist line or glancing at a pre-baby photo of myself? Tracing the silvery lines on my, now dimpled, thighs and feeling slightly less attractive, less deserving of my partners love and affection. I want to allow myself to overflow with love for my babies and their daddy, feeling proud of what I have and never feeling remorse for the body or the lifestyle I left behind - and this is how I plan on doing it in 2009…The Year of The Mom.

1). I will use my baby’s nap’s as “me time” and not “housework time”, to read a book, to take a shower, to have a nap…to do whatever I need to do.

2). Every Sunday afternoon I shall retire to the bathroom for 2 hours and shower, shave, pluck, brush, tan and manicure to my heart’s content. That way I will feel a little more attractive and a little less dishevelled each week.

3). Each time I look at my love handles or silvery stretchmarks I shall remind myself that a body is meant to be used. What good is a perfect size 8 figure when your dead? May as well get some miles out of this vehicle!

4). I will keep a stash of luxury cookies in the top cupboard where no-one will see them and I shall reward myself with one whenever I see fit.

5). Each morning, before I take one step out of my bedroom door, I’ll get myself dressed, hair brushed, make-up on, feeling ready to start the day.

6). After a stresful day with the sproglet, I will no longer turn to a bottle of wine and snacks for comfort – I will find comort in the arms of my partner, snuggled up on the sofa together.

7). Never again will I feel pressured to take part in the fashion show that is baby and toddler groups. I will not join in the competition of who can look their best, full face of make up, fashionable clothes, uncomfortable shoes. Instead I will put on my joggers and t-shirt and get down on the floor with my baby and take part in his adventure!

8). For 1 evening each week, I will go to an exercise class, where I can get fit, meet new people and spend an evening just being me – not mum, not housewife, just me! 

If I can keep these things up this year I will be much happier, you know what they say….If mum’s happy, everyone’s happy

This is 2009 – The Year of the Mum.

We are so lucky to be women!

Firstly let me begin by saying HAPPY NEW YEAR!  If you have kids and stil managed to stay up to see the New Year in, I am truely impressed. We were in bed by 10pm – Rock and Roll!

I have thought long and hard about this over the past few years and without being sexist at all, I  feelvery lucky to be a gal. Having stopped taking the pill (its been 4 days now) I am getting that special feeling back, just the same as when I was pregnant with Harry. The mere thought that I am going to be making a baby in the very near future makes me feel really unique. I know its the same for every women so I can’t be that unique but you must have felt this before girls.  When you are not pregnant you feel like everyone else, but when you are pregnant, people treat you differently. They make you feel precious and protected. You are carrying precious cargo and doing the most important job and everyone seems to respect that. Of course you get the odd chauvanistic pleb who will constantly remark on your ever expanding waistline (like my former boss, but thats another story!). In my humble opinion, we are the fortunate ones. It doesn’t matter to me how bad the stretch marks and saggy skin get after the job is done, its a small price to pay for the privilage of growing a little baby. If your partner is worth their salt then they will love every new mark on your body that each baby brings.

Angelina Jolie loses baby weight with Wii fit?? Do me a favour.

Obviously I’m bound to be a tad jealous of her post-pregnancy figure but this has to be the biggest lie on the face of the earth!!!! We all know how hard it is to lose weight after just one baby, but twins??? I think not. To be quite honest I am really disgusted that this has been implied at all. I mean she makes millions and all she does is play on the Wii to lose weight (cue hysterical laughter). What no personal Trainer, no home gym, no extreme dieting? I wonder if Wii’s sales figures have improved due to this story being published? I wouldn’t be suprised if the Jolie-Pitts are taking a slice of the profits (cynical and bitter that I am). Even if she had lost the weight that easily, it is extremely rare for a women’s tummy to return to the way it was after having twins. You would at least expect to see a saggy flap like the rest of us have. Don’t get me wrong, I wouldn’t criticise any women for using whatever method they deemed fit to lose the baby bulge. It is completely down to personal choice in my opinion. After the trauma of giving birth, its quite a kick in the teeth to find a different body starring you back in the mirror. My issue  is that this is a obviously a fib and no-one has come forward to correct it. Women out there that will see Angelina’s perfectly toned, slim body and rush out to buy the Wii Fit. There have even been some stories claiming Jolie had a tummy tuck (or “mummy tuck ” as she reportedly likes it to be called).

Would do you all think? I would LOVE to know. Maybe I am just a bitter, jealous old jelly belly.

Can you really make money working from home?

Since becoming a full time, stay at home mum, I have fallen into the trap of work from home scams. Not that I’d admit to anyone I know personally…far too embarrassed. I did, however, come across a website that does have very genuine opportunities and I have already had 2 job offers after some intense interviewing. I think due to the fact that they get applicants from all over the place, the do have to be more thorough with telephone interviews. One of them I applied for required me to do a rigorous online test which took all of 2 hours for me to complete! There are legitimate jobs ranging from Online Moderators, paying £12.00 an hour, to comission only internet sales roles. A lot of them require some kind of relevant experience especially the travel industry related positions. You may well know of it already but for those that don’t, I just wanted to share my knowledge of this site with you as we all know, times are hard what with the credit crisis, and no-one wants to resort to frigging leaflet distribution in this weather!

Here is the web address - www.workingmums.co.uk. Click on “Search all Jobs”. Make sure you select  “homeworking” in the drop down list under “location”.

If anyone knows of any other good sites like this one please make a comment and list the web address. I can’t stand the scams and so many people get caught out by them. I tell you some bugger is getting rich from them and it won’t be you.